When I was bleaching my hair, I had brunette nightmares.
I’d go to get a “root touch up” and suddenly find that an evil hair-dresser poured black dye over my hair. I’d wake up in a sweat, haunted for the rest of the day, double checking that my precious locks were still intact.
Blonde women make 7% more money than women of any other hair color, according to a recent study.
The Telegraph covered this and asked the president of the International Blonde Association for input (which is surely unbiased.) She explained that blondes are the most beautiful, most fun. Strangely, factors like weight, age and education didn’t matter in the study–blondes still earned more.
“Blondes are beautiful” has held weight in evolutionary psychology. The idea is men are attracted to blonde hair because it signifies youth and fertility. But what men also find important is glossy, healthy hair. The kind those commercial ladies swing around while someone narrates in the background.
As a former box-blonde, my hair was anything but shiny and did not have the ability to move like silk on a clothesline. It was more like cotton. In ball form.
Maybe it isn’t biology or beauty but simply behavioral. With bimbo-barbie stereotypes abound, how do women act when they are blonde? Do they act differently as brunettes?
If Elle Woods and her pink brief case weren’t telling enough (or the CBS special she inspired about blonde Harvard law students) studies have found the dumb blonde stereotype is alive.
But that blonde girl at work probably isn’t dumb, and neither is the one at the bar. And Elle wasn’t either….even though she did win her case due to a of a vast knowledge of hair products.
In another study by University of Coventry, men and women rated hair colors by viewing a model wearing different colored wigs — platinum blonde, natural blonde, brunette and red. When wearing platinum blonde the woman was rated as “less intelligent”, especially by men. When wearing the natural blonde wig she was rated as “popular.”
While blonde, I worked at a sushi bar in Chicago’s Gold Coast. The managers were guys; a little machismo, a little bro-y. At times, blonde jokes were thrown around. As a woman, groomed to make everyone else feel comfortable, I let them roll off or laughed, stepping into the role. I was playing the game and in turn I felt accepted.
I knew I wasn’t dumb and in the words of Dolly Parton, I also knew I wasn’t blonde. But it was confusing. Was I a ditz? Before speaking up, I second-guessed myself. I had to be doubly sure, because what I had to say was up for grabs. I could let the jokes cover a mistake I made, but it hurt.
Another study had blonde women test, before and after hearing blonde jokes. After being subjected to the jokes women scored significantly lower and read more slowly. So part of “perpetuating” the stereotype might be purely unconscious. Not to mention, damaging.
That summer of working at the sushi-bar turned to fall. My summer romance froze when the hair-dresser I was dating gave me a bad Brian Molko cut (that guy from the band Placebo). I went dark because the blonde made me look even more like an 11 year old boy.
And suddenly, I felt like an outsider at that job, the guys now seemed to stepped gingerly around me. Was it my presentation? My own paranoia? Did the not notice the punk and goth touches before?
When I had nightmares about losing my blonde hair, it was like I was losing something big, something important. Perhaps it was social beauty-acceptance, or an intuitive knowledge that I could get further and make more money. But ultimately, as a blonde, I am afraid I made myself non-threatening.
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I’ve never been blonde, but related: I spent a fair chunk of the past five years consciously deprogramming blonde-hate out of myself. Blonde hair (on women, that is) meant “purposeful adherence to beauty norms”, and “plays up to the boys; gets ahead” and other, less defined, unkind assumptions that I got from who knows where. Why did I think that?? I didn’t even really notice I thought it, until I realised I needed to stop!
Cripes.
.-= Claire´s last blog ..They’re adamantium ropes, okay? Like Omega Red had. >_> =-.
Claire, I feel you there! I still have to stop myself from short circuiting when I see a Playboy-esque girl with long blonde extensions. So, bleaching hair is adhering to a beauty-standard. But is it any different than wearing painful heels? Push up bras? Make-up?
When I had blonde hair because it was pixie-short and I was more alternative, I never really faced those stereotypes I held myself until later.
But, yeah I’ve still got to check myself. Hating on other women really doesn’t get us anywhere.
I’m a 27 year old and naturally a light brown with fair skin and blue eyes.
I started playing with hair color at 15. I have been red, brown, dark brown, brown with highlights, blonde….etc.
My actions have not changed according to my hair color.
Other’s have changed. I haven’t witnessed a blatant change in people opinion’s of my intellect. I have noticed that since I have had my long dark hair, I’ve been regarded as more sensual and wordly. Not so peppy and perky.
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..Personal Cheerleader =-.
I am naturally a deep brunette, and my hair is currently a little blonde, but mostly bright pink. That takes the unnaturalness of platinum to the next extreme, I think! Maybe this is obvious, but having pink hair has definitely changed the way people interact with me. Not in a bad way; on the contrary, people *listen* to me more. Having crazy coloured hair somehow makes people a great deal more interested in what I have to say. Maybe it’s a signal for having strong opinions.
I like it. It’s certainly changed my life.
Huh. I followed the link over here from GalaDarling.com, and I have to say, this was an excellent, thought-provoking article.
As a natural blonde, I’ve had a love-hate relationship with my hair my whole life. As a child, I wanted a head full of long, blue-black hair more than anything in the world. I CRAVED dark hair. I just knew as soon as I got old enough, I’d dye it. My hair was Children Of The Corn light- as I got older, it darkened underneath slightly, but it stayed fair blonde.
Never did dye it black. But spurred on by a love of The X-Files and the overwhelming feeling that I wasn’t actually a blonde but some sort of accidental imposter, I started dying my hair red. Bright red, orange red, crimson, even that horrible plum color. For YEARS I dyed my hair red, to the point where my friends (who had only briefly seen me as a blonde as I’d switched schools my last year of middle school) identified me as a red head. No one remembered me blonde- no one thought it suited me (I was the token Smart Girl at my school- the one who got mediocre grades everywhere but writing assignments and was known for reading too much and caring too little).
Then, when I was sixteen, my mother died, and I went to live with my father in another state. He hated red hair, made no bones about letting me know it. And really, I didn’t feel like the same Bre anymore. I WASN’T. I was someone else now. So I spent the money that the school had collected on my behalf before I left and had all the red dye stripped from my hair.
My hair was now yellow-blonde, bright and artificial and perfect in Florida, and the way people treated me altered IMMEDIATELY. I was taken less seriously, I was approached more often, and more people said they wanted to talk to me because I “looked friendly”. When I started college, I did so with a headfull of blonde hair…with huge purple chunks in the front. It went from there to bright, unearthly blue, and then back to a darker, more mellow navy color. I loved it- still love it- but in the summer in Florida, if you have light hair, there’s damn near no point. It turned teal, then a silvery sort of lavendarish green, then it faded out altogether.
My natural blonde grew in slowly and took over eventually, and now, it’s a strawberry-ish blonde that looks red in photographs (ironically enough). Lately I’ve been thinking of dying it brown, or some other new color. I still like black, but I’m uncertain. It’d be such a hassle to strip it again and let it grow back out if I turned out to hate it.
Elana,
Yeah the colored hair is another topic I’d like to explore. Every girl I know has some story about it and I want to hear them!
Bre,
Thank you for your great-read of a comment! Your story is beautiful, and totally relate-able, I feel like this is something that just doesn’t get talked about or taken seriously, I am so excited to hear about others experiences.
xoxo!
I’m SO sick of bleach blond. People look best in their natural hair and skin color. I shake my head when I see a chick going out of her way to make her skin darker and her hair lighter.
Hey! i just found out about your site and i like your articles very much. I can relate to what you talk about (i haven´t read all of them yet) and the topics make me think about lots of things.
My hair is dark blonde, my skin is very white,i have freckles and green eyes so when i was 19 years old i decided to become a redhead i thought it will look great so i did and i liked it a lot. I live in peru so here redheads are not a common thing so everytime i was walking on the street, at school, a party etc people turn to look at me, really it was a strong thing in a nice way even though i know some people thought (because of my hair color) i had a strong character and things like that which are true but they were judging by my hair color. Another thing is my family, boyfriend, friends who knew me with my natural hair color told me this color suit me a lot, they loved it as much as i did…
4 years later i wanted to change so i became blonde again but was scared to leave the red behind…to my surprise when i looked in the mirror i liked it a lot! and the ones that liked the red told me they like this color more than the red…
The thing is i think it´s very important how you feel inside because you bring that out no matter your hair color.
My english is so rusty! i need to work on my writing skills heheh.
kiss!
When I was a kid, I was a natural toe head. As I grew up, my hair gradually became darker and now it is somewhere between a light brown and a dark blonde… I’m not exactly sure. I have been highlighting it for years, and went to a silvery platinum last fall. I definitely think people see some of my actions and comments through a “blonde lens” as it were. I know I am smart, but for years I have been game to just play along. However it is not always clear when I am playing, and when I am just being dumb. I think often we rise and fall to the expectations others set for us, and it takes considerable self-awareness to meet your own expectations instead. In any case, I recently decided to go “back to my roots” and try something other than blonde for a while… getting my hair done next week, and I am really curious to see if it effects the way people perceive and interact with me.
I am naturally dark golden blonde and i get a few highlights to lift it a little. Im sure people assume i bleach my hair (even though its a caramel colour) cause my eyebrows are light-medium brown. Anyway. I love my hair, it suits my skin and i would look washed out brunette (ive had about 3 people tell me so haha, how nice). I agree, people look best in their natural colour and i feel thats so true for me.
What i do NOT like is guys instantly thinking i have that bimbo blonde thing going on. Honestly, i can turn my dumb blonde act on and off like a switch and i dont say that in a good way, i did that earlier in high school cause i felt the need to play up my hair colour, i dont even know what i thought it would achieve but there was such a feel that that was what is expected. I now am more than happy for people to know how smart i am and for me to be happy to put that intelligence to work. I want any othe girls out there to know acting like something your not wont attract any decent guys, just the wrong type that want a bimbo. i learnt that the hard way.
xx
I’ve had very blond (natural) hair all my life. I recently cut it about earlobe-length after 5 or 6 years of about waist-length hair.
I remember in high school getting a lot of blond jokes, and even making a few myself – I put “oxymoron” on the back of an intramurals shirt because I’m a smart blond. Although I did have to explain the joke to everyone. Now, I feel like I’ve heard all the blond jokes ever written..
Maybe I’ll go over to the dark side sometime, and see if I notice a “blond privilege.”
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